Every Roast Has Its Corn

Or does it? The answer is no, it does not.

This song was written by a forlorn chunk of beef in a can of Progresso Light Beef Pot Roast soup. A beef chunk that yearns for something that it will never have: the loving companionship of corn.

Every Roast Has Its Corn
Lyrics by Sad Beef Chunk

We both lie sodium-filled in a can of Progresso Light
Although we share this broth together, we have carrots at our side
Was something not steamed or something not boiled
Did the kernels not come out right?
Though I tried not hurt you
Though I tried
But I guess that’s why they say

Every roast has its corn
Just like every trout has its spawn
Just like every hippie smokes a giant water bong
Every roast has its corn

Yeah it does

I listen to my favorite pod saying I’m no good for you
Hear the pea say soup’s a game of easy come and easy go
But I wonder does pea know
Has pea ever felt like this
And I know you’d be an ear right now
If I could have shucked your husk some how
I guess

Every roast has its corn
Just like every trout has its spawn
Just like every hippie smokes a giant hookah bong
Every roast has its corn

Though it's been a while now
I can still feel so much pain
Like the thing that cuts the can open and soup’s poured
But the scar, that scar remains

(Badass solo)

I know I could have saved a lunch that night
If I’d known what to say
Instead of makin’ soup
We both made our separate ways

But now I hear you found some can of stew
And that you’re being used in chowder too
To hear that freaks me out inside
And to see you cuts me up bite-sized

I guess every roast has its corn
Just like every trout has its spawn
Just like every hippie smokes a giant home-made bong
Every roast has its corn

***

Are you unenlightened?